touristsconned:

STEP RIGHT UP FOLKS. YOU SUCKERS CUSTOMERS CAN BE THE FIRST TO EXPERIENCE QUALITY CONTENT ON YOUR DASH.

SWING ON BY TO TOURISTSCONNED AND GET YOUR DAILY DOSE OF STAN PINES. YOU’RE WELCOME TO GET AS MUCH AS YOU WANT– SO LONG AS YOU KEEP PAYING.

^{Wow… that sounded a bit suggestive. But hey– whatever makes sales.}

VISIT THE MYSTERY SHACK* TODAY

^{*the mystery shack is not responsible for your personal safety while on or around the location of the mystery shack. any lost or stolen items become the property of the mystery shack.}