A lesbian couple gets a shocking surprise one day when God (played by Laverne Cox) shows up at their door. Upset at how humans had turned her message of love and acceptance into a message of hate and discrimination, she decides it’s time to send Jesus back to earth and wants the lesbian couple to raise Jesus. Hilarity ensues.
No need for homophobic or transphobic jokes when you can have exchanges like “Ma’am your son turned the water fountain into wine again and got all the other students drunk” “Jesus Christ.” “….. I’m not sure if that’s suppose to be you responding to me or you requesting to speak to him.”
Also jokes about infinity-“Ask your mom”.
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
Mom #1: “Oh, I don’t know, sweetie. Ask your mom.”
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s?”
Mom #2: “I don’t know, have you asked your mom already?”
Kid praying: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
God: “Have you asked your moms already?”
OH MY GOD YALL ARE KILLING IT
Title: Jesus, Mary & Josephine
FUCKING YES
I kind of don’t care if I’m going to hell. This is hilarious, and I would watch it.
Shimmer opened her mouth to retort, but snapped it shut when she realized Nero was right. “Goddamn you.” She simply stated.
“Yeah. Damn me for trying to protect the one I love, right? I tell you, that God up there really sucks for runnin’ things that way.” Nero spun on his heel and scoffed… before looking back at Shimmer with a perked brow.
“Tell you what. If Armadia really wants to prove she’s sorry to me…” He lifts up the edge of his coat and just slaps the back of his ass. “Tell her to plant one right here – and then I’ll tell her to piss off.”
And with that last crude insult, he began walking off.
“God, no wonder demons hate you! You’re the biggest asshole on the face of this goddamn planet! If you really loved Kyrie, you’d respect her judgement and trust she knows what she’s doing! And if it turns out you’re wrong, THEN you get involved! Until then, she’s free talk to whoever she wants to talk to, demon or human you white haired PRICK!”
“Maybe not.” Shimmer said. “But let’s get one thing clear: I don’t care how big and strong you think you are, if I have to see her cry again like she did last night, I’ll find a way to kill you.”
“I welcome you to try that. You know why? For one thing, you’re not gonna succeed, and for another, Kyrie would be devastated if you did. So you’d probably just make that red pain in the ass even more upset – if she’s even genuine, which she’s not.”
Shimmer opened her mouth to retort, but snapped it shut when she realized Nero was right. “Goddamn you.” She simply stated.
“You said vengeance like it was a question. So do you know or don’t you?”
“Oh, I don’t know~ She only says it at least a hundred times a day. So maybe she’s not motivated by it at all.”
“Maybe not.” Shimmer said. “But let’s get one thing clear: I don’t care how big and strong you think you are, if I have to see her cry again like she did last night, I’ll find a way to kill you.”
“I know exactly what demons like her are after. Vengeance, right? Everyone’s got to be the bad guy but her,” Nero only rolled his eyes. Her apologies were such a crock…
“She can cry a fucking ocean for all I care.”
“You said vengeance like it was a question. So do you know or don’t you?”
“I think you just answered your own question, Shimmer, but I’ll offer up another answer too: she was crying because she got caught in her bullshit. I don’t care how sweet she’s acting, how much she cries – I don’t care if Dante’s got her under his thumb – I’m sure she would kill Kyrie at a moment’s notice, even knowing he’ll kill her in return. She’s just that kind of demon.”
“How do you know she’s that kind of demon?” Sunset said with a glare. “Demon or not, people can change their ways. Except for you apparently.”
TheWanderingSunset2 